Science
Climatologists Secure Funding To Breed Glaciers In Captivity
FAIRBANKS, AK—Researchers from the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration received a $42 million federal grant for a...
Honeybees Dying Mysteriously
American honeybees are being wiped out in record numbers by a mysterious illness. What do you think?
Research Grant Blown Wooing Cute Research Assistant
MISSOULA, MT—Professor Jim Neuthom's colleagues said they were suprised how many hot-air balloon rides and moonlit evenings were involved in studying trout populations.
Sharpton, Thurmond: Related?
The Rev. Al Sharpton wants his DNA tested agianst that of the late Senator Strom Thurmond to see if they are related. What do you ...
ESP Lab Closing
A Princeton University lab studying extrasensory perception (ESP) is closing. What do you think?
Scientists Create World's Largest Novelty Atom
CHICAGO—"Man, no way we're getting any more work done this year," said atomic physicist Dr. Thom Frederiksen after viewing the ridiculously huge atom.
NASA Launches Probe To Inform Pluto Of Demotion
NASA scientists launched a special Consoler probe to assure the former planet that it was nothing personal, and that it will make a "great dwarf ...
Focus Groups Hated It Right Up Until Guy's Head Got Cut Off
LOS ANGELES—A focus group of 150 people who saw this one movie, Fox Searchlight's modern adaptation of some Charles Dickens classic, were...
DNA Evidence Frees Man After 15 Years Of Marriage
JACKSONVILLE, FL—"I did not deserve to be put away in the prime of my life," said Henry Doswell, who spent more than a decade ...
Proud Cystic-Fibrosis Foundation Doesn't Need Your Charity
AITKIN, MN—A Dream To Breathe Foundation reasserted its status as a "non-profit organization" and expressed embarrassment at unnecessary "handouts."
Breast-Fed Babies No Smarter
According to research published in the British Medical Journal, breast feeding does not make babies any smarter. What do you think?










