Terrorist Living In U.S. Gets Why NSA Spying Such A Complicated Issue
UNDISCLOSED—In the midst of the ongoing national debate over the recently revealed NSA surveillance of American citizens, a Yemeni al-Qaeda operative currently living covertly ...
Terrorism
Islamic Extremist Gives Up On Radicalizing Dim-Witted Friend
PHILADELPHIA—After months of attempting to indoctrinate his friend with the militant ideology of Islamic fundamentalism, local man Khalid Sayed, an Islamic extremist actively working ...
Flag In Front Of Post Office Can Hardly Remember A Time It Wasn't Flying Half-Staff
MINERAL, VA—After this week’s bombing at the Boston Marathon prompted employees at a local post office to once again partially lower their American ...
The Onion's Tips For Finding A Suspected Terrorist
Invest millions of dollars into signs that say, “If You See Something, Say Something.” Put a phone number on those signs. Wait for phone to ...
Every Family Member's Birthday Now Marred By Some Tragedy
PENSACOLA, FL—After Monday’s deadly explosions at the Boston Marathon cast a pall over Conner Mason’s 7th birthday celebration, the Mason family reportedly ...
Authorities: Sadly, There Are Many People Who Could Have Done This
BOSTON—In the aftermath of yesterday’s bombings at the Boston Marathon, which left three dead and over 100 wounded, authorities announced this morning that ...
Area Man Growing A Little Tired Of Rushing Home To Hug Loved Ones
ST. LOUIS—Following the deadly explosions Monday that rocked the city of Boston, area man Tom Sifton told reporters he’s getting pretty tired of ...
This What World Like Now
BOSTON—After Monday’s horrific terror attack at the Boston Marathon that killed three and left hundreds injured, officials confirmed Tuesday that the bombings and ...
Ayman Al-Zawahiri Delivers TEDTalk On Changing Face Of Terrorism
ATLANTA—Addressing attendees gathered for this week’s TEDxEvolution Conference, al-Qaeda head Ayman al-Zawahiri delivered an informative and engrossing TEDTalk on the state of worldwide ...
Osama Bin Laden Foundation Awards Fellowships To 20 Promising Young Terrorists
ABBOTTABAD, PAKISTAN—Representatives of the Osama bin Laden Foundation announced Tuesday the winners of the 2013 Mohamed Atta Fellowship, an annually awarded scholarship and stipend ...
2011 Top Story: Navy SEALS Discover Bin Laden Gained 300 Pounds
In one of the biggest stories of 2011, U.S. Special Forces shot and killed bin Laden and then removed his obese body from his ...
Nation Would Rather Think About 9/11 Than Anything From Subsequent 10 Years
NEW YORK—As media coverage of the 10th anniversary of 9/11 ramps up this week, citizens across the United States collectively realized they would ...
Al Qaeda infrastructure
"We want to turn your bridges into rubble, but if we claimed credit for making them collapse, nobody would ever believe us," - Ayman al-Zawahiri, Al ...
Al-Qaeda Claims U.S. Mass Transportation Infrastructure Must Drastically Improve Before Any Terrorist Attacks
WASHINGTON—In a 30-minute video released Thursday, al- Qaeda leader Ayman al-Zawahiri criticized the mass transportation infrastructure of the United States, claiming significant repairs and ...
Conceptual Terrorists Encase Sears Tower In Jell-O
CHICAGO—The attackers made it clear America's outdated notion of terrorism has been challenged, and that true terror lies in the futility of human ...
After 5 Years In U.S., Terrorist Cell Too Complacent To Carry Out Attack
SAN CLEMENTE, CA—"We at least have to see the next new episode of Lost before spilling the blood of the infidels," cell leader and ...
In The Know: War On Terror
Our success in the war on terrorism may lead to other problems: Terrorist ghosts.
