Tv | The Onion - America's Finest News Source

- A.V. Club
- Store
- Dating
- Contests

In The News
- Biden Jumping Motorcycle
- Blowjob Queen
- Kennedy Death List
- Cowering Animals
- Last Updated 12:21 PM

tv

Tom Hanks Forces Houseguests To Play 'World War II' With Him

ISSUE 46•16 | 04.24.10 | News

LOS ANGELES—Two-time Academy Award winner Tom Hanks, 53, once again invited a group of friends to his home and forced them to play a make-believe game of World War II with him, sources reported Saturday. more»
NBC Admits To Never Actually Making An Episode of 'Chuck'

ISSUE 46•15 | 04.12.10 | News in Brief

LOS ANGELES—The NBC action-comedy Chuck, familiar to millions of viewers from its long-running promo bumpers, does not actually exist, network executives admitted Friday. more»
Our 'NCIS' Spec Script Issue

ISSUE 46•10 | 03.12.10 | Sunday Magazine
Scrappy Crew Of 'Good Morning America' Decides To Put On A News Show

ISSUE 46•07 | 02.18.10 | News

NEW YORK—"We're gonna write our own scripts and read from 'em and tell everyone in the whole world about stuff that's happening," said George Stephanopoulos, who had everybody line up to try their best newscaster voice. "I'm gonna talk about the president." more»
Science Channel Refuses To Dumb Down Science Any Further

ISSUE 46•04 | 01.26.10 | News

SILVER SPRING, MD—"We already have a show called 'Punkin Chunkin,'" said Science Channel president Clark Bunting. "What more do you people want?" more»
God's Wrath According To Pat Robertson

ISSUE 46•03 | 01.20.10 | Infographic

700 Club founder Pat Robertson stated that the earthquake in Haiti, which may have killed 100,000 people, was God's punishment... more»
Final Season Of 'Lost' Promises To Make Fans More Annoying Than Ever

ISSUE 46•02 | 01.18.10 | Newsroom

Producers say the last season of 'Lost' will contain an unprecedented number of twists and turns for fans to endlessly debate around people who don't care at all. more»
Conan May Leave 'Tonight'

ISSUE 46•02 | 01.13.10 | American Voices

Saying that he doesn't want to take part in the destruction of the Tonight Show legacy, Conan O'Brien announced he will step down from the... more»
Cowell Leaving 'American Idol'

ISSUE 46•02 | 01.13.10 | American Voices

Acerbic British talent-show judge Simon Cowell is leaving the program he has helped make popular over the past eight years. What do you... more»
That Show About The Lady Sheriff Finally Released On DVD

ISSUE 46•02 | 01.13.10 | News in Brief

WAVERLY, NE—A comprehensive 12-disc box set containing every episode of that show about the lady sheriff is now available for retail... more»
State Of The Union Could Coincide With 'Lost' Premiere

ISSUE 46•02 | 01.11.10 | American Voices

Fans of the show Lost were up in arms when it was announced that President Obama's State of the Union address might preempt the show's season... more»
Editorial Cartoon - December 7, 2009

ISSUE 45•50 | 12.07.09 | Editorial Cartoon
George Stephanopoulos Offered 'Good Morning America' Job

ISSUE 45•50 | 12.07.09 | American Voices

Former adviser to President Clinton and television host George Stephanopoulos has been offered a job as co-anchor of Good Morning America.... more»
Meredith Baxter Comes Out

ISSUE 45•49 | 12.04.09 | American Voices

Former Family Ties actress Meredith Baxter came out as a lesbian on The Today Show. What do you think? more»
'Sesame Street' Turns 40

ISSUE 45•49 | 12.02.09 | Infographic

The public broadcasting mainstay Sesame Street celebrated its 40th anniversary last month. Here are some highlights from... more»
Shared Memory Of Children's Television Show Leads To Sex

ISSUE 45•49 | 12.02.09 | News in Brief

PHILADELPHIA—A shared memory of the Nickelodeon series You Can't Do That On Television resulted in the act of sexual intercourse... more»
Comedians

ISSUE 45•49 | 12.01.09 | Slideshow
'The Office' Ends As Documentary Crew Gets All The Footage It Needs

ISSUE 45•48 | 11.23.09 | News in Brief

SCRANTON, PA—After nearly six years on the air, NBC's hit show The Office ended abruptly Thursday when documentary filmmaker Ian... more»
ABC Cancels 'Hank'

ISSUE 45•47 | 11.16.09 | American Voices

After airing five episodes, ABC has canceled the Kelsey Grammer disgraced-CEO-returns-to-small-hometown sitcom Hank. What do you... more»
Lou Dobbs Leaves CNN

ISSUE 45•46 | 11.13.09 | American Voices

The outspoken CNN anchor announced Wednesday that he was resigning, effective immediately. What do you think? more»
U.S. Deports Lou Dobbs

ISSUE 45•47 | 11.12.09 | News

WANTAGE, NJ—Acting on anonymous tips from within the Hispanic-American community, U.S. Customs and Border Protection officials deported Luis Miguel Salvador Aguila Dominguez, who for the last 48 years had been living illegally in the United States under the name Lou Dobbs. more»
Travel Channel Blows Its 'Bed And Breakfasts Of New England' Wad

ISSUE 45•44 | 10.26.09 | News in Brief

GARRETT, MD—After airing four consecutive days of programming devoted to mulled cider, antique weather vanes, and changing foliage, the... more»
Television, Processed Foods Couldn't Be More Proud Of Child They Raised

ISSUE 45•43 | 10.23.09 | News

CHICAGO—"We're just so proud of Brian and everything he's failed to accomplish in his largely sedentary and insipid life," said ABC president Stephen McPherson, whose network was there to receive the infant the day he came home from the hospital. more»
Vince Vaughn Appears On 'Tonight Show' To Deceive Country About Latest Film

ISSUE 45•42 | 10.16.09 | News

HOLLYWOOD, CA—"It's a really funny movie, and I think people are going to enjoy it," lied the 39-year-old performer, knowing full well that he was misleading viewers into making a decision that was not in their best interests. "It's got something for everybody." more»
Jon And Kate's Messy Public Divorce

ISSUE 45•42 | 10.14.09 | Infographic

Since announcing their plans to divorce, Jon and Kate Gosselin, subjects of the TV show Jon And Kate Plus Eight, have had... more»
My Living Nightmare Of Encouraging Kids To Read Is Over

ISSUE 45•39 | 09.24.09 | Commentary

Thank god. After 26 long years, I can finally rest easy. Twenty-six years I spent standing in front of a camera, gritting my teeth, and... more»
The Troubled Future Of Reality Shows

ISSUE 45•38 | 09.16.09 | Infographic

The recent death of DJ AM has jeopardized Gone Too Far, a yet-to-air MTV program in which he helps people battle their addictions.... more»
Music Companies Suing 'Ellen'

ISSUE 45•38 | 09.15.09 | American Voices

The Ellen DeGeneres Show is being sued by a number of record labels, including Sony, Warner Bros., and Motown, for unauthorized use of music... more»
News Of Jenna Elfman Sitcom Sends Herd Of Buffalo Into Wild Stampede

ISSUE 45•36 | 08.31.09 | News in Brief

WYOMING—Hundreds of buffalo thundered across the Wyoming plains Thursday after news of actress Jenna Elfman's latest sitcom, Accidentally... more»
Market Evidently Capable Of Supporting More Than One Reality Show About Cake

ISSUE 45•35 | 08.26.09 | News in Brief

CHICAGO—Though the stock market remains shaky and consumer spending has reached a standstill, the U.S. economy is apparently still robust... more»