The Onion Weather Center focuses on the Midwest, where a storm system should recede into the distance like any hope of a stable economic future ...

BOSCOBEL, WI—Returning from a three-year stint in Afghanistan, Army Spc. Corey Schuh told reporters Wednesday he could not believe the WRBX AM "ZooCroo Featuring ...

According to scientists, flooding and wet weather have led to unusually high mosquito populations this summer, and the accompanying heat wave has resulted in numerous ...

EARTH—According to a statement released to the press Tuesday, the planet Earth has "just about run out of ways" to let its roughly 6 ...

SILVER SPRING, MD—Meteorologists at the National Weather Service announced Monday that Americans should begin preparing for perfect soup weather, which will hit many parts ...

If you know an idiot, please make sure they're safe and not standing naked in a snow embankment on a dare. 

In anticipation of the snowstorms that paralyzed the mid-Atlantic, store shelves were stripped bare, leaving some unlucky citizens without the...

LONDON—According to State Department officials, the violently clashing peoples of Israel and Palestine have agreed to resume small talks...

FORT MEYERS, FL—According to meteorologists, the massive storm could make as many as 3 million residents every bit as homeless as they've been ...

WASHINGTON—Leading meteorologists classified the hybrid storm as an F4 tornado, Category 5 hurricane, and Level 7 redemptive act of God.

Critic claims The Weather Channel shamelessly overreports stories on hurricanes and weekend forecasts at the expense of other news.

Experts advise that anyone venturing outdoors should be on the lookout for extremely crunchy leaves and winds as high as 12 mph.

NEW ORLEANS—"Please don't run," said the hurricane, addressing residents fleeing from a press conference in the now destroyed Superdome. "I'm not here ...