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Area Man

Area Man Holding Out Until Next Exit For Better Fast Food Options 11.29.08

ERIE, PA—"I think I want Wendy's," Don Turnbee told reporters. "There hasn't been a Wendy's in a while so there will probably be one in a couple of exits." more»

Sports »

Kobayashi Retires From Eating

Kobayashi

NAGANO, JAPAN—Mere hours after eating what he claims to be his "farewell meal" Tuesday, longtime competitive consumer of comestible goods Takeru Kobayashi formally announced that, after a career that has spanned nearly his entire lifetime,... more»

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  • King Of Pop Dead At 12
    1 hour ago

    Michael Jackson LOS ANGELES—Michael Jackson, a talented child performer known for his love of amusement park rides and his hobby of collecting exotic animals for his Neverland Ranch, died from sudden cardiac arrest Thursday at the age of 12.......more»

  • Horoscopes »

    Aquarius Jan 20 - Feb 18

    Turns out it was the butler, in the study, with the candlestick. But enough about your love life.

  • TV Listings »

    The Bachelorette

    ABC

    8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. CDT

    After viewing a production of Tony N' Tina's Wedding, the bachelorette, clad in a penis-shaped hat and a sash, gets drunk on oversized margaritas with 11 of her friends at a local Mexican place, then dances lewdly for hours in a nearby bar with no dance floor.

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Economy

  • Video »

    US To Trade Gold Reserves For Cash Through Cash4Gold.com
    34 minutes ago

    Cash4Gold Treasury officials say the gold has just been in the bottom of some vaults at the US Bullion Depository anyway, and the government needs the money NOW....more»

  • New Homely Doll To Improve Self-Image Of Young Girls
    1 hour ago

    Doll EL SEGUNDO, CA—Mattel, which has been criticized in the past for promoting unrealistic standards of beauty, claimed that the new doll would not only improve the self-esteem of growing girls, but would also give them someone to feel superior to for hours on end....more»

  • Real Estate »

    Your dream home!

    DreamSometimes, dreams do come true. Not this time, though. Buy this mediocre home and then imagine you live somewhere much, much better. Back deck with light wood rot an ideal place to fantasize about a superior domicile. Reference #45234536

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