The Onion

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

California Citrus In Danger

The recent west-coast cold snap is jeopardizing the California citrus industry. What do you think?

Young Man

Francis Hawker,
Corporate Librarian
"Oh well. The vodka is the only part of the screwdriver I really want, anyway."

Young Woman

Anna Sinclair,
Stock Broker
"With the nation's Sunny D supplies at risk, we may all have no alternative but to choose the purple stuff."

Asian Man

Clark Pramson,
Luthier
"Can't some Mexicans just sit on the orange groves to keep them warm?"

All American Voices

Personal of the Day