The Onion

Friday, November 30, 2007

D.C. Tops In AIDS

The District of Columbia has the highest AIDS rates in the country. What do you think?

Old Woman

Susan Olivera,
Systems Analyst
"At least it'll expedite the time they have to live in abject poverty."

Old Man

Walter Poloni,
Bookbinder
"A high rate is good isn't it? Or am I confusing AIDS with Annual Percentage Yields?"

Black Man

Richard Turk,
Humorist
"As a homophobic political humorist, I'd say this qualifies as manna from heaven."

All American Voices

Personal of the Day