The Onion

Tuesday, December 4, 2007

Evel Knievel Dead

Legendary stuntman Evel Knievel died at home last week at the age of 69. What do you think?

Black Man

Alan Thurber,
Taxi Driver
"His spirit will live on in every vacant lot, every row of 13 Pepsi delivery trucks, and every 20-foot-long box filled with rattlesnakes."

Young Woman

Cathy DuBrow,
Psychiatric Nurse
"That's too bad. I was rooting for his oxygen to complete the leap over the blood-brain barrier."

Old Man

Strom Gustavson,
Roofer
"Thank God. Now I can finally let my kids watch TV again. Of course, they are in their 40s."

Personal of the Day