The Onion

Thursday, May 1, 2008

Hospital-Record Snoop Indicted

A former administrative specialist at the UCLA hospital was indicted for illegally accessing the medical records of some celebrities, including Farrah Fawcett and Maria Shriver, and, in some cases, selling the information. What do you think?

Asian Man

Bruce Roh,
Librarian
"Oh man, what was Farrah Fawcett's blood type? I bet it was AB+."

Old Man

Dale Wilson,
Garment Inspector
"Any word on Bob Costas' records? Because I think he's the cause of this rash."

Old Woman

Deb Fine,
Horticulturalist
"Is this really that bad? In a way, it's almost a convenience to hear the results of your Pap smear just by turning on Access Hollywood."

All American Voices

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