The Onion

Thursday, December 20, 2007

Immigration At Highest In 80 Years

According to a new report by the Center for Immigration Studies, immigrants now account for one in eight U.S. residents. What do you think?

Asian Man

Walter Merril,
Architect
"Fortunately, the fact that one in four people is a jingoistic nut job helps even things out."

Old Man

Fritz Blumenthal,
Volunteer Coordinator
"Ein in acht? Das ist unglaublich!"

Old Woman

Barb Koepke,
Cashier
"Does that mean that someone in my family is an immigrant? I wonder if it’s John."

All American Voices

Personal of the Day