At the AV Club: Favorite Album Deep Cuts

American Voices

Monday, August 11, 2008

Kosher Plant Cited For Child Labor

Investigators uncovered 57 child labor violations at a kosher meatpacking facility in Iowa. What do you think?

Young Man

Ken Smith,
Systems Analyst
"Is 57 the number of child labor violations it takes to make something kosher?"

Old Woman

Carol Williams,
Quality Control Inspector
"Man, having to slaughter animals by the kosher process of a single cut across the throat to a precise depth, severing both carotid arteries, both the jugular veins, the vagus nerves, the trachea and the esophagus, no higher than the epiglottis and no lower than where the cilia begin inside the trachea, thus causing the animal to bleed to death would probably really fuck you up as a kid.”

Old Man

Bix Blumenthal,
Haberdasher
"Nothing's going to happen, though. Everyone knows that Jews control the kosher-meatpacking-facility media."

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