The Onion

Friday, July 25, 2008

Novak Hits Pedestrian With Corvette

Columnist Robert Novak struck a pedestrian while driving a black Corvette on Washington D.C.'s K Street, and had to be chased down by a bicyclist before he stopped. What do you think?

Young Woman

Nelly Petrachonis,
Systems Analyst
"Why is this news? I assume he does this every week."

Young Man

Eric Steuff,
Pilot
"That pedestrian had better pray he didn't dent Novak's Corvette or else expect retaliation in an upcoming article."

Black Man

Evan Campo,
Camp Counselor
"Who was the pedestrian? Or will we have to wait for Robert Novak to publicly reveal his identity?"

Personal of the Day