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At the AV Club: Best Music Of The '00s

American Voices

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Sen. Stevens Found Guilty

Sen. Ted Stevens (R-AK) was found guilty of ethics violations for not reporting expensive gifts, including $250,000 worth of home improvements from the owner of an oil-services company. What do you think?

Old Woman

Cynthia LaBelle,
Real Estate Magnate
"It used to be you could bribe an Alaskan senator with just $10,000—and still have enough left for a licorice chew and an opera ticket."

Asian Man

Tim Garland,
Systems Analyst
"Christ, can't our Alaskocentric media focus on something else besides Alaska?"

Old Man

Joseph Parton,
Business Supplies Salesman
"Oh, is reporting expensive gifts something we are supposed to be doing? Darrick and Ann, those porcelain sauce bowls I got you for your wedding? ONE HUNDRED AND SEVENTEEN DOLLARS. For two sauce bowls. Happy now?"

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