Tuesday, December 16, 2008
The Onion's 2008 In Review: The Economy
The Dow Jones Industrial Average has fallen nearly 6,000 points since reaching its all-time high of more than 14,000 last year. What do you think?
Curtis Langford,
Systems Analyst
"I'm sure that'd be even more terrifying if I knew what the points represented."
Cindy Greenlagh,
Systems Analyst
"C'mon, I've seen this happen a thousand times. The stock market crashes, and then twenty years and a world war later, everything's fine."
Ryan Timms,
Systems Analyst
"This sounds like a perfect time to hatch my poorly conceived, undercapitalized business venture, so that when it fails I can blame the economy."
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07.10.09
| Issue 45•28
An annual survey found that, for the fifth consecutive year, Mississippi was the American state with the highest rate of adult obesity. What do...
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07.09.09
| Issue 45•28
Green Dam, the image-scanning software designed by the Chinese to block pornography, also blocks more benign images, including a Garfield movie...
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07.08.09
| Issue 45•28
Claiming to be "95 percent cured," President Obama admitted he still occasionally smokes a cigarette. What do you think?
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07.07.09
| Issue 45•28
Portable music became a reality 30 years ago with the introduction of the Sony Walkman. What do you think?
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07.06.09
| Issue 45•28
Actor Karl Malden, known for his work in A Streetcar Named Desire and The Streets Of San Francisco, died at 97. What do you...
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06.26.09
| Issue 45•30
Singer Michael Jackson died yesterday at 50. What do you think?