<?xml version="1.0" encoding="UTF-8"?>
<rss xmlns:media="http://search.yahoo.com/mrss/" xmlns:dc="http://purl.org/dc/elements/1.1/" version="2.0"><channel><ttl>60</ttl><title>Onion News Network</title><link>http://tv.theonion.com/</link><language>en-us</language><copyright>2010 The Onion, Inc.</copyright><description>The Onion News Network is the 24-hour cable TV news choice for billions of viewers in 811 countries. Now the hard-hitting, award-winning news you need is available anytime and anywhere you want. Subscribe and watch right now.</description><item><title>[video] In The Know: Should Americans Return To A Simpler, Stone Age Lifestyle?</title><link>http://www.theonion.com/content/video/in_the_know_should_americans</link><description>Panelists reminisce about how much better things used to be 10,000 years ago.</description><media:content url="http://videos.theonion.com/onion_video/2007/09/02/GOOD_OLD_DAYS_iTunes.mp4" fileSize="10122806" expression="full" type="video/mp4" duration="89"><media:player url="http://videos.theonion.com/onion_video/2007/09/02/GOOD_OLD_DAYS_iTunes.mp4" height="818" width="980"/><media:thumbnail url="http://www.theonion.com/content/files/images/GOOD_OLD_DAYS.jpg" height="279" width="341"/><media:keywords>Business, In The Know</media:keywords></media:content><media:category>In The Know</media:category><pubDate>Thu, 13 Sep 2007 02:00:00 -0400</pubDate><guid>http://www.theonion.com/content/video/in_the_know_should_americans</guid><dc:identifier>66481</dc:identifier></item><item><title>[video] 'Students First In Line' Program To Offer Job Training At Needy Schools</title><link>http://www.theonion.com/content/video/students_first_in_line_program_to</link><description>The nation's poorest schools will receive extra government funding to teach their students skills like rifle assembly and precision marching.</description><media:content url="http://videos.theonion.com/onion_video/2007/09/02/MILITARY_TRAINING_iTunes.mp4" fileSize="11130668" expression="full" type="video/mp4" duration="97"><media:player url="http://videos.theonion.com/onion_video/2007/09/02/MILITARY_TRAINING_iTunes.mp4" height="818" width="980"/><media:thumbnail url="http://www.theonion.com/content/files/images/MILITARY_TRAINING1.jpg" height="267" width="400"/><media:keywords>Business, News Room</media:keywords></media:content><media:category>News Room</media:category><pubDate>Mon, 10 Sep 2007 20:01:15 -0400</pubDate><guid>http://www.theonion.com/content/video/students_first_in_line_program_to</guid><dc:identifier>66316</dc:identifier></item><item><title>[video] In The Know: Are America's Rich Falling Behind The Super-Rich?</title><link>http://www.theonion.com/content/video/in_the_know_are_americas_rich</link><description>Panelists discuss a new study showing the gap between the wealthy and the absurdly wealthy is widening, and how we can help the merely rich catch up.</description><media:content url="http://videos.theonion.com/onion_video/2007/09/SUPER-RICH_ITUNES_iTunes.mp4" fileSize="17977783" expression="full" type="video/mp4" duration="162"><media:player url="http://videos.theonion.com/onion_video/2007/09/SUPER-RICH_ITUNES_iTunes.mp4" height="818" width="980"/><media:thumbnail url="http://www.theonion.com/content/files/images/SUPER-RICH.jpg" height="267" width="400"/><media:keywords>Business, In The Know</media:keywords></media:content><media:category>In The Know</media:category><pubDate>Thu, 06 Sep 2007 01:01:39 -0400</pubDate><guid>http://www.theonion.com/content/video/in_the_know_are_americas_rich</guid><dc:identifier>66140</dc:identifier></item><item><title>[video] Missing Girl Probably Raped</title><link>http://www.theonion.com/content/video/missing_girl_probably_raped</link><description>Bloomington, IN police say they have absolutely no information about a missing college student. Alan Fisher investigates the possible rape.</description><media:content url="http://videos.theonion.com/onion_video/2007/09/MISSING_GIRL_ITUNES_iTunes.mp4" fileSize="17940401" expression="full" type="video/mp4" duration="153"><media:player url="http://videos.theonion.com/onion_video/2007/09/MISSING_GIRL_ITUNES_iTunes.mp4" height="818" width="980"/><media:thumbnail url="http://www.theonion.com/content/files/images/MISSING_GIRL_STILL_UPDATE_2.jpg" height="267" width="400"/><media:thumbnail url="http://www.theonion.com/content/files/images/MISSING_GIRL_tabs.tabs.png" height="83" width="125"/><media:keywords>Local, News Room</media:keywords></media:content><media:category>News Room</media:category><pubDate>Tue, 04 Sep 2007 01:01:07 -0400</pubDate><guid>http://www.theonion.com/content/video/missing_girl_probably_raped</guid><dc:identifier>65977</dc:identifier></item><item><title>[video] National Lost And Found: Did You Lose A Flag Of The Marshall Islands?</title><link>http://www.theonion.com/content/video/national_lost_and_found_did_you</link><description>If you've misplaced something, the National Department of Lost and Found is the place to turn.</description><media:content url="http://videos.theonion.com/onion_video/2007/08/04/LAF_KEYTIME_iTunes.mp4" fileSize="14048181" expression="full" type="video/mp4" duration="124"><media:player url="http://videos.theonion.com/onion_video/2007/08/04/LAF_KEYTIME_iTunes.mp4" height="818" width="980"/><media:thumbnail url="http://www.theonion.com/content/files/images/LAF_KEYTIME.jpg" height="267" width="400"/><media:keywords>Local, ospan</media:keywords></media:content><media:category>ospan</media:category><pubDate>Thu, 30 Aug 2007 01:01:40 -0400</pubDate><guid>http://www.theonion.com/content/video/national_lost_and_found_did_you</guid><dc:identifier>65839</dc:identifier></item></channel></rss>