60Onion News Networkhttp://tv.theonion.com/en-us2009 The Onion, Inc.The Onion News Network is the 24-hour cable TV news choice for billions of viewers in 811 countries. Now the hard-hitting, award-winning news you need is available anytime and anywhere you want. Subscribe and watch right now.[video] Report: Nations Wealthy Cruelly Deprived Of True Meaning Of Christmashttp://www.theonion.com/content/video/report_nation_s_wealthy_cruellyThe nation's poor get to experience true Christmas spirit, while the wealthy, burdened by shopping and party obligations, are left out in the cold.Business, News RoomNews RoomSun, 02 Dec 2007 01:05:00 -0500http://www.theonion.com/content/video/report_nation_s_wealthy_cruelly71057[video] Mitt Romney Is Candidate Most Voters Want To Get Into Bar Fight Withhttp://www.theonion.com/content/video/mitt_romney_is_candidate_mostAccording to a new survey, whether a candidate seems like they could take a sucker punch in a drunken brawl is extremely important to voters.Politics, Mitt RomneyThu, 29 Nov 2007 01:00:00 -0500http://www.theonion.com/content/video/mitt_romney_is_candidate_most70446[video] Fat Kid Successfully Avoids Ridicule By Swimming With Shirt Onhttp://www.theonion.com/content/video/fat_kid_successfully_avoidsToday Now! brings you the inspiring story of Brian Peete, a fat boy who hid his obesity from other children at the pool by keeping his shirt on.Local, Today NowToday NowTue, 27 Nov 2007 01:00:00 -0500http://www.theonion.com/content/video/fat_kid_successfully_avoids70281[video] Rep. Gary Nelson (R-CT) Introduces The Gary Nelson Personal Pay Raise Billhttp://www.theonion.com/content/video/rep_gary_nelson_r_ct_introducesCongressman Gary Nelson has an economic plan to raise his family's standard of living.Politics, ospanospanThu, 22 Nov 2007 01:00:00 -0500http://www.theonion.com/content/video/rep_gary_nelson_r_ct_introduces70191[video] Americans Enjoying Thanksgiving Tradition Of Sitting Around At Airporthttp://www.theonion.com/content/video/americans_enjoying_thanksgivingThanksgiving is a time for far-flung family members to reunite with each other and share in holiday cheer at the airport.News RoomNews RoomTue, 20 Nov 2007 01:05:00 -0500http://www.theonion.com/content/video/americans_enjoying_thanksgiving69998