60Onion News Networkhttp://tv.theonion.com/en-us2009 The Onion, Inc.The Onion News Network is the 24-hour cable TV news choice for billions of viewers in 811 countries. Now the hard-hitting, award-winning news you need is available anytime and anywhere you want. Subscribe and watch right now.[video] Entertainment Scientists Warn Miley Cyrus Will Be Depleted by 2013http://www.theonion.com/content/video/entertainment_scientists_warnUnless Americans turn to alternative sources of entertainment, the 'Hannah Montana' star will soon be completely tapped out.Entertainment, News Room, Miley Cyrus, Music, Celebrities, teens, Michael JacksonNews RoomMon, 30 Jun 2008 19:30:00 -0400http://www.theonion.com/content/video/entertainment_scientists_warn82120[video] Today Now!: How To Pretend You Give A Shit About The Electionhttp://www.theonion.com/content/video/today_now_how_to_pretend_you_giveOur morning show's political correspondent offers tips on how you can seem informed about politics without picking up a single newspaper.Politics, Elections, Voting, Today NowToday NowWed, 25 Jun 2008 17:59:15 -0400http://www.theonion.com/content/video/today_now_how_to_pretend_you_give81911[video] Supreme Court Rules Death Penalty Is 'Totally Badass'http://www.theonion.com/content/video/supreme_court_rules_death_penaltyDespite arguments against capital punishment, the Justices overwhelmingly approved its use, especially if they get to participate in some executions.Politics, News Room, Death Penalty, Supreme Court, CrimeNews RoomMon, 23 Jun 2008 14:27:58 -0400http://www.theonion.com/content/video/supreme_court_rules_death_penalty81809[video] Study: Most Children Strongly Opposed To Childrens Healthcarehttp://www.theonion.com/content/video/study_most_children_stronglyA recent survey of children found that they are not in favor of increased doctor visits and vaccinations.Science & Technology, News Room, Children, HealthNews RoomTue, 17 Jun 2008 15:26:08 -0400http://www.theonion.com/content/video/study_most_children_strongly81451[video] High School Tony Awards Honor Nation's Biggest Drama Club Nerdshttp://www.theonion.com/content/video/high_school_tony_awards_honorHigh school theater's brightest stars gathered last night to see who would take home the coveted award for Most Awkward Kiss.Entertainment, News RoomNews RoomMon, 16 Jun 2008 19:30:00 -0400http://www.theonion.com/content/video/high_school_tony_awards_honor81348