Latest Austin Powers Movie Opens In Theaters
06.17.08 | Issue 44•25
Dollar Store Has Great Deal On Fig Nortons
07.08.08 | Issue 44•28
50-Year-Old Prince Licks AARP Representative's Face
06.18.08 | Issue 44•25
Desperate 'Time' Magazine Announces 'Man Of June'
06.11.08 | Issue 44•24
Goldfish Teetering On Edge Of Sanity
04.25.07 | Issue 43•17
Pier 1 Issues Formal Apology For Rattan Death March
02.10.99 | Issue 35•05
Hootie and the Blowfish: Breaking Down Racial Barriers Between Black, White Pussies
08.21.96 | Issue 30•02
Previous
Next
Oprah Viewers Patiently Awaiting Instructions
The Onion is not intended for readers under 18 years of age.
© Copyright 2009 Onion Inc. All rights reserved.
more personals »