Clinton Molested By Visiting Uncle
WASHINGTON, DC—In a tearful address to the American people Monday, President Clinton announced that he would be taking an indefinite leave of office to recover from his recent molestation at the hands of his visiting uncle Carl.
"My fellow Americans," the president said during the nationally televised speech, "two weeks ago, my uncle Carl came to visit me and take a tour of the White House. And at one point during that tour, while we were alone in the Lincoln Bedro...
