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February 27, 2002 - March 5, 2002 | Issue 38•07

Ad-Agency Art Director 'Humbly Honored' To Be Working With Absolut

NEW YORK—Roland Kiefer, a recently hired art director with the advertising agency TBWA/Chiat/Day, was overcome with emotion Monday upon learning that he will join the team responsible for the Absolut vodka campaign. "Absolut set the bar for brand image and recognition," said a visibly moved Kiefer, 34. "Over the past 22 years, they've made themselves one of the...

March Named Breast Cancer Obliviousness Month

issue 3807 | 02.27.02 | News

SAN FRANCISCO—The National Breast Cancer Obliviousness Foundation is gearing up for Breast Cancer Obliviousness Month, to be observed across the... more»
Treasury Department Badly Needs Ones And Fives

issue 3807 | 02.27.02 | News

WASHINGTON, DC—Critically low on small denominations, the Treasury Department put out an urgent call for ones and fives Monday. more»
Man Back With Woman His Best Friend Spent Week Criticizing

issue 3807 | 02.27.02 | News

PHILADELPHIA—On Sunday, Chris Sorum, 26, rekindled his relationship with Kate Mulberry, the ex-girlfriend Sorum's best friend Danny Weir had spent... more»
Genetically Modified Broccoli Shrieks Benefits At Shopper

issue 3807 | 02.27.02 | News In Brief

BREMERTON, WA— A head of genetically modified broccoli shrieked its numerous benefits at shoppers Monday in a Seattle-area Safeway. "I contain... more»
Parents' Password Cracked On First Try

issue 3807 | 02.27.02 | News In Brief

REDONDO BEACH, CA— Nick Berrigan, 14, successfully hacked into his parents' AOL account on the first try Tuesday, correctly guessing that "Digby"... more»
Upset Woman Forced To Re-Sigh Louder

issue 3807 | 02.27.02 | News In Brief

MCKEESPORT, PA— Failing to elicit sympathy or concern with her first attempt, Staffing Solutions office manager Connie Lindel was forced to... more»
$5 Million Bounty Placed On Recession

issue 3807 | 02.27.02 | News In Brief

WASHINGTON, DC— A determined President Bush posted a $5 million bounty on the nation's economic downturn Monday. "This recession may run its... more»
Lee Greenwood Urges U.S. To Take Military Action Against Iraq

issue 3807 | 02.27.02 | News In Brief

NASHVILLE, TN— With sales of "God Bless The U.S.A." waning after a five-month surge, country singer Lee Greenwood urged the U.S. to take military... more»
Warranty Outlasts Company

issue 3807 | 02.27.02 | News In Brief

LODI, NJ— The five-year warranty for a UniTek MP3 player outlasted the product's manufacturer, which closed Monday after two years in business. "I... more»
LL Cool J Struggles To Come Up With Way To Brag About Being In Rollerball

issue 3807 | 02.27.02 | News In Photos
School Bully Not So Tough Since Being Molested

issue 3807 | 02.27.02 | News In Photos
Who Knew It Would Be So Easy To Impersonate A Priest?

issue 3807 | 02.27.02 | Commentary

I've admired priests all my life. Whenever a priest walked into a room, everyone seemed to look at him with respect and admiration. I always thought... more»
I Almost Lost It All

issue 3807 | 02.27.02 | Columnists

Hola, amigos. What say? I know it's been a long time since I rapped at ya, but your old pal Jim's been thicker than a donkey's dick with problems. more»
Horoscope for the week of February 27, 2002

issue 3807 | 02.27.02 | Horoscopes

This week, envy rears its ugly head, realizes there's nothing enviable about you, blinks a couple times, and goes back to sleep. more»
The New Sesame Street

issue 3807 | 02.27.02 | Infographic

For its 33rd season, which began last month, Sesame Street has been given its biggest overhaul ever. Among the changes: more»
New Cell-Phone Features

issue 3807 | 02.27.02 | Statshot
The Cigarette Tax

issue 3807 | 02.27.02 | What Do You Think?

Twenty-two states are considering raising cigarette taxes to generate extra revenue, and in New York City, the cost of a pack may reach $7. What do... more»