Celebrating 10 Years Online

THE ONION DISPATCH

DAILY
WEEKLY

More Newsletters

PERSONAL OF THE DAY



What Do You Think?

The Nuclear Response

Calling nuclear retaliation against attackers "an option," President Bush wants to build up the U.S. nuclear arsenal as a means of deterrence. What do you think?


Astrology

This Week’s Horoscopes

Pisces: You will successfully foil a secret plot to infiltrate your house and surprise you with birthday gifts, cake, and good wishes.

From Our Sponsors

© Copyright 2008, Onion, Inc. All rights reserved.
The Onion is not intended for readers under 18 years of age.
Powered By Rackspace