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November 20, 2002 - November 26, 2002 | Issue 38•43

Mother Jealous After Reading Daughter's Diary

IRVINE, CA—Roberta Dunn, 40, experienced feelings of intense jealousy Monday after reading the diary of her 14-year-old daughter Hannah. "I try to respect Hannah's privacy, but I also feel it's my duty as a parent to know what she's doing in her free time," said Dunn, a single mother divorced since 1994. "It turns out, unlike some people who barely have the energy...

FBI: Muslim Groups In U.S. May Be Developing Nuclear Families

issue 3843 | 11.20.02 | News

WASHINGTON, DC—According to an FBI report released Monday, "reliable and substantive evidence" exists indicating that Muslims residing in the U.S.... more»
U.S. Consumer Confidence Down, Says Guy Trying To Sell Van

issue 3843 | 11.20.02 | News

BROCKWAY, PA—In more bad news for the U.S. economy, consumer confidence is down sharply this week, particularly among those in the market for a... more»
Modern-Day Proust E-Mails Friend Six Times A Day

issue 3843 | 11.20.02 | News

RUTLAND, VT—Much like the prolific novelist, Eric Dressler generates prodigious volumes of prose via endless streams of e-mail. more»
Spy World-Famous

issue 3843 | 11.20.02 | News In Brief

MONTE CARLO—Despite having a job that demands total anonymity, Colin Richards, Great Britain's number-one field operative, has somehow built a... more»
85 Percent Of U.S. Cole Slaw Remains Uneaten

issue 3843 | 11.20.02 | News In Brief

WASHINGTON, DC—According to a report released Monday by the Department of Sides and Garnishes, 85 percent of U.S. cole slaw is never consumed.... more»
Infant Doing Everything In Her Power To Save Relationship

issue 3843 | 11.20.02 | News In Brief

BOSTON—Eight-month-old Courtney Brindle is trying her best to save her parents' crumbling marriage, the infant reported Monday. "I put in a good... more»
Teacher Bitches About Paycheck To Sixth-Grade Class

issue 3843 | 11.20.02 | News In Brief

BOZEMAN, MT—Lakecrest Elementary School teacher Dana Frankel bitched to her sixth-graders about her "crap salary" shortly after receiving a... more»
Drummer's Girlfriend Thinks He Should Sing

issue 3843 | 11.20.02 | News In Brief

CHAPEL HILL, NC—Angie Carlson, 22, girlfriend of AstroPuffs drummer Steve Molzen, encouraged him to sing on some of the band's songs Monday. "You... more»
Jesus Surprises 700 Club With Walk-On Appearance

issue 3843 | 11.20.02 | News In Brief

VIRGINIA BEACH, VA—Monday's episode of the popular Christian-affairs program The 700 Club featured a surprise walk-on by Jesus Christ, who... more»
Guy From The Strokes Accused Of Trying To Look Like Guy From The Strokes

issue 3843 | 11.20.02 | News In Photos
Pillsbury Doughboy's Image Sexed Up

issue 3843 | 11.20.02 | News In Photos
When I'm Feeling Blue, I Can Always Go To My Undisclosed Location

issue 3843 | 11.20.02 | Commentary

Life can be pretty overwhelming sometimes. The daily stresses of family, friends, and being vice-president of the world's most powerful nation can... more»
Rehab Clinics Are So Much Cooler In Europe

issue 3843 | 11.20.02 | Commentary

I'm always hearing people go on and on about how American rehab clinics are the best in the world. You gotta be kidding me! Sure, the U.S. has a few... more»
Horoscope for the week of November 20, 2002

issue 3843 | 11.20.02 | Horoscopes

Your decision to start over with a brand-new life is admirable, but to do it properly, you should probably quit your job at Olive Garden. more»
New York City's Olympic Bid

issue 3843 | 11.20.02 | Infographic

New York is inthe running to host the 2012 Summer Games. more»
What Was The Last Straw?

issue 3843 | 11.20.02 | Statshot
The Bin Laden Audiotape

issue 3843 | 11.20.02 | What Do You Think?

Last week, al-Jazeera aired an audiotape purportedly of Osama bin Laden praising the Sept. 11 attacks. What do you think about the possibility... more»
Bodybuilding Tips

issue 3843 | 11.20.02 | Tips

More and more Americans are pumping iron. more»