Celebrating 10 Years Online

THE ONION DISPATCH

DAILY
WEEKLY

More Newsletters

PERSONAL OF THE DAY



What Do You Think?

McDonald's Unveils Healthier Image

Last week, McDonald's announced plans to offer healthier menu items and encourage its customers to get more exercise. What do you think?


Astrology

This Week’s Horoscopes

Taurus: There comes a time in all of our lives when we're forced to admit that we need help, though it's not usually with getting a piano off our chests.

Infographic

Online Music Stores

Online Music Stores

From Our Sponsors

From the Archives

U.S. Forms Own U.N.

March 26, 2003 | Issue 39•11

Walking Sports Database Scorns Walking Sci-Fi Database

October 17, 2001 | Issue 37•37

Five Or Six Dudes Jump Out Of Nowhere And Just Start Whaling On This One Guy

May 31, 2000 | Issue 36•20

Gene Wilder To Make Horrible, Horrible Movie

October 7, 1997 | Issue 32•10

Rat Fancy Magazine Fails To Catch On

June 18, 1997 | Issue 31•21

© Copyright 2008, Onion, Inc. All rights reserved.
The Onion is not intended for readers under 18 years of age.
Powered By Rackspace