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FEMA Disaster Survival Tips

Recent events have underscored the importance of being properly prepared to deal with the effects of natural disasters. With that in mind, the Federal Emergency Management Agency has prepared the following guidelines.


Astrology

This Week’s Horoscopes

Libra: You'll spend next week feeling like the proverbial motherless child a long way from home without anyone in the world who cares for you, which is pretty self-indulgent, considering the thousands of people who literally are that.

From Our Sponsors

Updates: Wednesday 9/28/05

American Voices

Cigarette Moderation Still Kills

Old Woman
"That's okay, because I only smoke one cigarette a night with a glass of red wine."


More American Voices

9/28/05 6:16 AM

Onion Magazine

Onion Weekender For Seniors

9/30/05 9:13 AM

National News Highlights

Roll over locations for news

  • ESCANABA, MI—In an upset win that has Las Vegas bookmakers stunned, the Escanaba High Hornets defeated the Menominee Memorial Fish Hawks 23-21.
  • PHILADELPHIA—Residents of Adam Carolla's hometown celebrated their native son's success by heroically sitting through the first seven minutes of Too Late With Adam Carolla.
  • ARROYO ROJO, NV—Arroyo Rojo residents were slightly more depressed than usual when they learned that the town's sole employer, United Staples, a manufacturer of standard staples, is moving operations to Taiwan.
9/27/05 6:27 AM

Stock Watch

AAPL Apple

Shares of Apple climbed today on news that the company had successfully indoctrinated all iPod users with an unending barrage of subliminal pro-consumption messages that play every time the device is used.

9/29/05 12:53 PM

This Day In History

Malcolm X: 'I Also Have A Dream'

September 28, 1964

Malcolm X: 'I Also Have A Dream'

9/28/05 7:53 AM
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