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In Brief
- Singing, Dancing Man Just Getting Started
- U.S. Intelligence: Burundi May Be Developing Telephone
- T.G.I. Friday's Executive Chef Recommends Booze-On-Meat-With-Cheese Thing
- Class Of '88 Reunion Attendees Once Again Trick Sue Thorpe Into Thinking Jeff Urban Likes Her
- Special Ops Veteran Slips Back Into Family Undetected
- First-Ever Untouched Photos Of The Weird Birthmark On Barack Obama's Face
- Blog: The Anti-Obama Attack Campaign Is Developing, And So am I!
- Video: Gunman Kills 15 Potential Voters In Crucial Swing State
- Video: Extreme Weather Alert: Meteorologists Predict Intensely Brisk Autumn
- Video: 12-Year-Old Boy Scouts Volunteer To Give Women Breast Exams
- Police: iPhone Left In Hot Car For Three Hours
- 900-Pound Giant Squid Joins Cast Of 'The View'
- Obama Under Fire For Playing T-Ball During Vietnam
- Statshot: What Is The $700 Billion Bailout Being Spent On?
- Obama Clinches 'Joe Cabernet Sauvignon' Vote
- Video: Obama Runs Constructive Criticism Ad Against McCain
- U.S. Debt Outgrows Debt Clock
- Video: 12-Year-Old Boy Scouts Volunteer To Give Women Breast Exams
- Video: Gunman Kills 15 Potential Voters In Crucial Swing State
- Police: iPhone Left In Hot Car For Three Hours
- Video: Extreme Weather Alert: Meteorologists Predict Intensely Brisk Autumn
- Members Of Twisted Sister Now Willing To Take It
- Obama Clinches 'Joe Cabernet Sauvignon' Vote
- Obama Under Fire For Playing T-Ball During Vietnam
- 900-Pound Giant Squid Joins Cast Of 'The View'
- Video: Obama Promises To Stop America's Shitty Jobs From Going Overseas
- Scott Bakula Jumps Into McCain's Body Just Before Election
- 900-Pound Giant Squid Joins Cast Of 'The View'
- Opinion: We're Sick And Tired Of Raising Your Young
- Video: Gunman Kills 15 Potential Voters In Crucial Swing State
- Dog Experiences Best Day Of His Life For 400th Consecutive Day
- Scott Bakula Jumps Into McCain's Body Just Before Election
- The Anti-Obama Attack Campaign Is Developing, And So am I!
- Slideshow: Food & Dining
- Radio News: Michelle Obama All That Stands Between Love-Struck Media, Barack Obama
- Historical Archives: Secret Society Of Free-Bakers Has Fail'd To Gain Influence
- Obama Under Fire For Playing T-Ball During Vietnam
- Scientists Say Stuff-Shaking Reaching Dangerous Levels
- New Jimmy Buffett Song 'Cold Weather and Personal Responsibility' Disappoints Long-Time Fans
- Department Of Treasure Releases 2008 Doubloons
- Manny Ramirez Asks Red Sox If He Can Work From Home
- Pocket Electronic-Bible-Verse Database Coveted
- Trouble Again In TV's Africa
- Apartment Built On Sacred Samoan Land Brings No Complaints From Residents
- Heroic Cancer Sufferer Inspires Others To Get Cancer
- That Trip To Canada Really Broadened My Horizons
- Starlet-Viewer Age Difference Quickly Calculated
Features
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Sunday Magazine
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Stockwatch
A lot of people are walking around with a $10.95 haircut now, and the market is recognizing Cost Cutters as being on the vanguard of this trend.
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National News Highlights
Roll over locations for news
- SPRINGFIELD, MO—This week's Secret Society meeting will be held at the city hall in room 233B.
- NEW YORK—A claim made by Beastie Boys member Adam "Ad-Rock" Horovitz was proven wrong when the island nation of Jamaica produced more than 18,000 mangoes while Mr. Horovitz himself could only produce 4,181 rhymes.
- HOUSTON—911 dispatcher Jeff Richland is sick of all the incompetents who can't deal with an armed burglar or a knife wound on their own.
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Trip To Native American Museum Turns Into Cigarette-Buying Spree
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Congress To Raise Alpacas To Aid Struggling Economy
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Just Six Corporations Remain
IN FOCUS: Local
IN FOCUS: Politics
IN FOCUS: Business
Issue Highlights
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Teenager Ridiculed For Using Sunscreen
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Man Attempts To Stand In Attractive Woman's Line Of Vision
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Loud Friend Makes Loud Point
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Report: 82% Of Wiseguys Think They're Real Funny
From our News Partners
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CNN
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Slate
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AV Club
