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September 12, 2009 - September 18, 2009 | Issue 45•37

Next Tarantino Movie An Homage To Beloved Tarantino Movies Of Director's Youth

MADRID—While attending a European press junket Monday for his film Inglourious Basterds, director Quentin Tarantino announced that his next project, Jack Rabbit Slim, will go into production this fall, and will be an homage to his favorite director and screenwriter of all time: Quentin Tarantino. "I've been a Tarantino fan for as long as ...

Area Man Unsustainable, Experts Warn

issue 4537 | 09.12.09 | News

WASHINGTON—Experts predict 39-year-old Doug Mahoney's most nutrient-rich layers will be washed away by the end of the decade, leaving little... more»
Liechtenstein, Andorra Forced To Fight By Larger Countries

issue 4537 | 09.11.09 | News

HELSINKI—"They have to do it for real, though; they can't just declare a cease-fire after 20 minutes,” German chancellor Angela Merkel said.... more»
Thousands Of Abandoned, Foreclosed Homes Threatened By Florida Hurricane

issue 4537 | 09.08.09 | News

FORT MEYERS, FL—According to meteorologists, the massive storm could make as many as 3 million residents every bit as homeless as they've been... more»
University Of Illinois Researchers Find Link Between Attending University Of Illinois, Receiving Solid Education At Great Price

issue 4537 | 09.11.09 | News In Brief

URBANA, IL—According to a new study conducted by researchers at the University of Illinois, there is a strong correlation between... more»
Latest Department Of Interior River Count Comes Up One Short

issue 4537 | 09.10.09 | News In Brief

WASHINGTON—Officials at the Department of the Interior scrambled this week when their annual tally of the nation's rivers repeatedly came... more»
Man Abuses Child Quietly Out Of Respect for Other Diners

issue 4537 | 09.09.09 | News In Brief

FORT SMITH, AR—Hoping to avoid rudely interrupting the meals of nearly two dozen other patrons, James Larson lowered his voice while... more»
Teacher Wishes She Could Inspire One Of The More Popular Students

issue 4537 | 09.08.09 | News In Brief

GRESHAM, OR—After spending half an hour Monday instilling much-needed confidence in one of her most timid freshmen, Sam Barlow High... more»
White Sufficiency Movement Asserts Whites Right Up There With Other Races

issue 4537 | 09.07.09 | News In Brief

EVANSVILLE, KY—Members of the Somewhat Aryan Nation, the country's most outspoken white sufficiency group, held a rally Tuesday night... more»
Team Jacket-Wearing, Transistor Radio-Listening Fan Sitting By Himself

issue 4537 | 09.10.09 | Sports News

CHICAGO–For the 213th game in a row, witnesses in Wrigley Field's upper deck section 433 reported seeing the same unidentified fan wearing a... more»
Die Young, Live Fast

issue 4537 | 09.11.09 | American Voices

A recent survey suggests teens who believe they'll die at a young age are more likely to engage in risky behavior. What do you think? more»
Wikipedia Contributors Mostly Male

issue 4537 | 09.10.09 | American Voices

A new study of Wikipedia showed that 87 percent of the site's editors were male. What do you think? more»
Teens Don't Tweet

issue 4537 | 09.09.09 | American Voices

A survey by Nielsen found that only 16 percent of Twitter users were under 25. What do you think? more»
Xbox 360 Least Reliable

issue 4537 | 09.08.09 | American Voices

A study of repair records showed that the Xbox 360 was substantially less reliable than its competitors. What do you think? more»
Cartel Kills 18 In Rehab

issue 4537 | 09.07.09 | American Voices

A Mexican drug cartel is being blamed for the shooting deaths of 18 patients at a rehab clinic. What do you think? more»
Town Loses All Hope After Closing Cheesecake Factory

issue 4537 | 09.13.09 | Radio
Company Says It's Producing A Lifestyle, Not A Corn Chip

issue 4537 | 09.12.09 | Radio
Nation's Wood Nymphs Unveil Plan To Reduce Dependence On Foreign Dewdrops

issue 4537 | 09.11.09 | Radio
Alphabetizing Project Abandoned At 'M'

issue 4537 | 09.10.09 | Radio
Bail Money Factored Into Vacation Fund

issue 4537 | 09.09.09 | Radio
President Obama Holds Surprise Rooftop Press Conference

issue 4537 | 09.08.09 | Radio
New 2010 Rake Hits Store Shelves Today

issue 4537 | 09.07.09 | Radio
New Study: Books Don’t Take You Anywhere

issue 4537 | 09.09.07 | Radio
Long-Lost Jules Verne Short Story 'The Camera-Phone' Found

issue 4537 | 09.09.07 | Radio
Last Literate Person On Earth Dead At 98

issue 4537 | 09.09.07 | Radio
Surinamese Man Struggling To Write The Great Surinamese Novel

issue 4537 | 09.09.07 | Radio
Pope Plans To Go Back In Time To Prevent Literacy

issue 4537 | 09.09.07 | Radio
Editorial Cartoon - September 7, 2009

issue 4537 | 09.07.09 | Editorial Cartoon
Small-Town Sheriff Has Actually Killed Surprising Amount Of People

issue 4537 | 09.12.09 | News In Photos
'Diary Of Anne Frank' Found In Attic

issue 4537 | 09.08.09 | News In Photos
I Don't Need Drugs To Have A Good Time And Jump Through A Plate-Glass Window Into A Pool 15 Stories Below

issue 4537 | 09.08.09 | Commentary

You know, some people just don't get it. They think they need to smoke a little grass, maybe do a little blow, or ingest several grams of... more»
A Smoove Evening

issue 4537 | 09.10.09 | Columnists

Damn. The last year has been full of challenges and heartbreak for Smoove B. His one true girl continues to ignore his many... more»
Your Horoscopes

issue 4537 | 09.08.09 | Horoscopes
Who Will Replace Kennedy

issue 4537 | 09.09.09 | Infographic

Malachy O'Halloran: Dorchester, MA retired ironworker, bar regular, and professional Irish American You: Could... more»
What Didn't We Get Around To This Summer?

issue 4537 | 09.09.09 | Statshot
Americans Observing 9/11 By Trying Not To Masturbate

issue 4537 | 09.10.09 | Video

Americans say attending a 9/11 vigil or observing a moment of silence to only then come home to jerk off is disrespectful and wrong. more»
NFL Players Mentor Troubled Detroit Lions

issue 4537 | 09.07.09 | Video

Thanks to the NFL's Mentoring Program, the Lions got to spend a fun-filled day with the pros learning to catch, tackle. more»
Crime & Crime Fighters

issue 4537 | 09.15.09 | Slideshow
Does This Man Know He's About To Get His Achilles Tendon Slashed?

issue 4537 | 09.11.09 | Sunday Magazine
No One On 'Baseball Tonight' Staff Recalls Hiring Dave Winfield

issue 4537 | 09.10.09 | Photo Finish
Man Momentarily Forgets Cell-Phone Conversation Fake

issue 4537 | 09.11.09 | Newswire
Girlfriend’s Little-Girl Voice Terrifying

issue 4537 | 09.07.09 | Newswire