"You mean, in less than a year, the damned will be carried off to the sulfurous pits of hell by hideous, moth-winged reptiles straight out of a Hieronymus Bosch triptych? Cool."
WASHINGTON, DC—Millions of scarfless snowmen gathered in Washington to protest global warming, which has caused many of them to melt before their time.
NEW YORK–Citing his "responsibility as a public figure to the betterment of the community" and his "longstanding commitment to issues of concern to women," talk-radio personality Howard Stern announced Tuesday the First Annual Howard Stern Women's Health Symposium.
HUNTSVILLE, AL–Jesus Christ, son of God and noted pro-life activist, killed two and critically wounded seven others when He opened fire in the waiting room of a Huntsville abortion clinic Tuesday.
In what has been called the largest gastrointestinal rescue effort in history, the United Nations allocated $1.2 billion in antacid relief yesterday for the indigestion-wracked nation of America.
What Now?
Pre-Millennium Tension
