The Onion

Family Not Appreciably Enriched By Trip To Mount Rushmore

May 10, 2001 | Issue 37•19

KEYSTONE, SD–Despite predictions to the contrary, the Lurmans' visit to Mount Rushmore failed to enrich the Portage, MI, family or bring its members closer together. "I guess I thought we'd all bond a little," father Tom Lurman said. "But, aside from lending [daughter] Katie $5 to get something at the snack bar, we didn't really even interact all that much." Lurman said he was prepared to share details of the construction of the monument with his children, but they never asked.

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