The Onion

The NYC Smoking Ban

October 2, 2002 | Issue 38•36

New York is one of a number of U.S. cities considering a ban on smoking in restaurants and bars. What do you think?

Old Woman

Shelly Sabel,
Lighting
Designer

"This is a victory for annoying people like me who call cigarettes 'coffin nails' and 'cancer sticks' and all that sort of stuff."

Asian Man

Jef Awada,
Real-Estate
Agent

"Has Amnesty International heard about this?"

Young Man

Tom Epstein,
Actor
"I can't stand cigarette smoke, but no one seems to care down at the Drink & Smoke & Drink & Smoke Tavern."

Black Man

Jim Mackil,
Advertising
Executive

"Now that New York has addressed the problem of secondhand smoke, maybe they'll tackle the problem of secondhand human-waste stench."

Old Man

Dennis
McCormack
,
Systems
Analyst

"But what will I draw slowly on to indicate that I'm contemplating what's been said by my dinner companion?"

Young Woman

Elizabeth
Gabbay
,
Waitress
"As a bar waitress, I'm glad someone is protecting my right to work in a bar that doesn't make any money."

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