The Onion

More Police Brutality In L.A.

July 24, 2002 | Issue 38•26

The Inglewood police officer seen on a videotape violently arresting a handcuffed black teenager has pleaded innocent to an assault charge.What do you think?

Young Man

Rob Phelps,
Electrician
"How were those officers supposed to know that kid wasn't going to sprout an extra pair of arms from his back and pull a gun out of his neck as he lay pinned to the car's hood?"

Black Man

Christopher James,
Architect
"They were just following the motto of the Inglewood Police Department: 'To protect and whomp the shit out of.'"

Asian Man

Pete Bruge,
Cashier
"I'm just glad I live on the East Coast, where police are heroic."

Old Man

Daniel Ziff,
Systems Analyst
"Why must we always focus on the bad cops instead of the 65 percent of police officers who would never do anything like this?"

Young Woman

Diane Essen,
Student
"I'm sure those officers wouldn't have done that unless it was absolutely necessary in order to hurt the guy."

Old Woman

Emily Schofield,
Dietitian
"That tape was shameful. One cop brutalizes a suspect while five others just stand around? What do I pay my taxes for?"

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