Dick Cheney's Heart
Last week, vice-president Dick Cheney, a four-time heart-attack victim, underwent angioplasty surgery. What do you think about his heart problems?
Adrienne Knox,
Student
"Wait a second: I thought Bush was the one with the heart, and Cheney was the one with the brains."
Benjamin Evans,
Systems Analyst
"Dick Cheney's heart may be a mass of marbleized fat and its arteries choked with bacon rind, but to me, it's made of one thing: pure gold."
Pete Powell,
Clerk
"If Cheney ever has a heart attack during a press conference, he should clutch his chest and shout, 'Elizabeth, I'm comin'!'"
Carolyn Hester,
Caterer
"Cheney has failed to heed the cautionary words of Billy Joel, who warns that working too hard can give you a heart attack-ack-ack-ack-ack-ack."
Marc Andersen,
Cardiologist
"As a doctor holding a plastic, cross-sectioned model of a human heart, let me just say this: Think of the heart as a piston in a car engine..."
Bud Lathrop,
Roofer
"So Cheney went back to work a day after heart surgery? I gotta hand it to him–he practices what he preaches, healthcare-wise."
