mobile edition

At the AV Club: Best Music Of The '00s

National

High U.S. Incarceration Rates

September 3, 2003 | Issue 39•34

The Justice Department reports that one in every 37 U.S. adults has been in prison, giving our nation the highest incarceration rate in the world. What do you think?

Young Man

Joe Wengert,
Waiter
"Look on the bright side—36 of us are free. USA! USA! USA!"

Young Woman

Risa Woods-Tanouye,
Receptionist
"I guess you can only talk about getting tough on crime for so long before you have to back it up with meaningless arrests."

Old Woman

Sarah Burns,
Title Examiner
"Whoa. I'd better start cutting back on my citizen's arrests."

Asian Man

Anthony King,
Sound Engineer
"We should privatize prisons! Not because it would help the rate of incarceration. I've just always wanted to own a prison."

Black Man

Bret
Christensen
,
Systems Analyst
"And did you know that half of the people currently serving time were prosecuted under the Anti-Skitching Act passed in 1978 to curb wintertime pranks?"

Old Man

Lennon Parham,
Underwriter
"But that can't be. I easily know 37 people and... Oh, wait. I forgot my stint for vehicular homicide in the '80s. Never mind."

Cut-and-paste

Include:

Preview

Copy and paste this code into a new post in Blogger, MySpace, or any other blog tool. It will display this Onion headline, picture, and teaser copy on your page, depending on what you select above.

It's up to you to write the rest of the blog post.

 

Text This Headline

 

Powered by TeleFlip use to email to any cell phone

  • Print
  • blog this
  • StumbleUpon
  • Reddit
  • digg this

Meet Other Onion Readers

more personals »