The Onion

Talking Tax Reform

April 28, 1999 | Issue 35•16

Tax season was recently upon us once again, and with it came widespread calls for reform, including simpler forms and a more streamlined filing process. What do you think about making tax-filing less complicated?

Young Woman

Caroline Reece,
Waitress
"With e-filing, the government's seizure of nearly half my assets was quicker and easier than ever this year."

Old Man

Ed Howard,
Systems Analyst
"I agree that there is a major need for Rax reform. They routinely fail to maintain a well-stocked salad bar, and the waitstaff is quite rude."

Asian Man

Ubit Batangpang,
Shoe-Factory Worker
"Technically, I work for the U.S., but as an Indonesian shoe-factory worker, I'm lucky enough not to have to pay taxes."

Young Man

Gordon Biasucci,
Custodian
"Taxes?"

Black Man

Nelson Childs,
Chiropractor
"For all the taxes I pay, I should at least be allowed to use the roads. What? Really? Hot damn!"

Old Woman

Liz Dryden,
Teacher
"I pay almost 40 percent of my total income in taxes, but at least it pays for a top-notch educational system, responsible community policing and comprehensive health care. Of course, I'm Canadian."

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