The Onion

Fahrenheit 9-11

May 19, 2004 | Issue 40•20

Disney recently blocked Miramax from releasing Michael Moore's Fahrenheit 9-11, a film criticizing President Bush's handling of Sept. 11. What do you think?

Young Woman

Pamela Turner,
Marine Engineer
"Disney is afraid of controversy? But they were the first ones to point out how wrong it is to be an evil witch."

Old Woman

Jean Collins,
Clerk
"I used to be a big fan of Michael Moore, until he turned all political."

Asian Man

Juan Sanchez,
Interpreter
"Moore's prominent presence in the news brings to light some serious questions, such as 'Can't he at least try to look presentable?'"

Black Man

Walter Reed,
Systems Analyst
"So Eisner, Moore, and the Weinsteins are involved in the story of Bush and bin Laden? Is anyone decent a part of this at all?"

Young Man

Sammy Campbell,
Video Editor
"Disney insists that it wants to remain apolitical, but that doesn't explain its controversial 1971 cartoon, Donald's Laos-y Cambodian Vacation."

Old Man

Keith Scott,
Statistician
"Why doesn't Michael Moore ever make documentaries about nice things, like where cotton candy comes from?"

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