Food Critic Tears Radish Canapés With Salmon Mousse A New Asshole

September 7, 2005 | Issue 41•36

MANCHESTER, NH—An appetizer of radish canapés with salmon mousse served at local French restaurant La Maison de Vin was torn a new asshole this week, according to Concord Monitor food critic Bernard Haberle, who reviewed the establishment in his "Good Eating" column.

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"I ripped those canapés a hole so wide they'll be shitting blood for days," said Haberle, who singled out the dish in his review, calling it "a misguided fusion of land and sea."

"The mousse alone got a reaming that will have it crying for its mama," he added.

The hors d'oeuvres, presented on a bed of arugula topped with a salmon mousse of blended shallots, green onions, and white wine, were "force-fed their own balls" by Haberle, who in his column described the menu item as "a modest offering that should have aspired for more."

"I beat the living fuck out of that dish," said Haberle, whose column has over the last 15 years become a staple in the Concord Monitor "Lifestyles And Culture" section.

"If that appetizer knows what's good for it, it'll get on its knees and pray for mercy from sweet baby Jesus, because I went John Wayne Gacy on that shit," Haberle said. "Those canapés are probably wishing they had a dollop of crème fraîche to hide behind."

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