Jackie Harvey
Jackie Harvey graduated from Viterbo University with a degree in English literature in 1990. After honing his writing and copy-editing skills at The Sunshine Shopper, he became The Onion's entertainment columnist in 1994, replacing the outgoing Archie "Arch" Danielson. Currently, Harvey writes his regular column, "The Outside Scoop," as well as his blog, "Harveywood!"
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Thu, Oct 13, 1:01 amI went to see the Reese Witherspoon movie I was talking about last time, but I tore my pants on my doorframe on the way out. By the time I had changed pants, I would have missed the previews, so I decided to play Jackie's Movie Roulette and see whatever movie was playing next when I got to the theater. Sometimes it's a bust, but sometimes, you're pleasantly surprised and you get a Something About Polly. That movie made me want to buy a ferret for months.
This time, I wasn't so lucky. I went to see a movie that, like Dukes of Hazard was based on a TV show. The movie was called Serenity. Now, I've never seen the original Serenity series. In fact, I had never heard of it, and I write about this stuff, for the love of Pete. It was a space series, which I usually like, but there was something that bothered me about it.
After about an hour into it, I figured it out. There were no space aliens! Why make it a space movie if you're not going to have any aliens in it? Why not just make it an earth movie? We've all seen aliens in movies before. We know they exist. So why not show them? I guess the cast was really good, but they would have really been better if they had a space alien to play off of. (two stars)
