The Onion

Thursday, October 13, 2005

The FBI And Pot

The FBI is considering relaxing their strict standards for past marijuana use among prospective agents. What do you think?

Asian Man

Gerald Leslie,
Therapist
"I think it's a good change. The FBI should be open to considering applicants who attended college at some point in their past."

Young Man

Craig Lefferts,
Salesman
"As long as the FBI sticks to its '3 Strikes And You're Out' policy on masturbation, their reputation will remain intact."

Young Woman

Theresa Spillman,
Police Officer
"What's next? Allowing drunks to join the police?"

All American Voices

Personal of the Day