On Rumors That Kentucky Derby Horses Were Dosed With Steroids: | The Onion - America's Finest News Source

At the AV Club: Best Music Of The '00s

Latest:

Lakers Players Claim Kobe Bryant's Groin Is Tender To The Touch
Matt Ryan Annoyed By 30-Yard Line's WiFi Reception
Player Whistled Dead
Poll: 3.1% Of NFL Coaches Would Go For It On Fourth Down On Their Own 28
ESPN Staff All Praying Bill Simmons Doesn't Ask How They Liked 'Book Of Basketball'

Thursday, May 8, 2008

On Rumors That Kentucky Derby Horses Were Dosed With Steroids:

"They say Big Brown's testicles have shrunk to the size of cantaloupes."

"You think Colonel John went up 13 bridle sizes from nutrition and yoga?"

"Yeah, turns out Eight Belles legs weren't broken. They just exploded from so many steroids."

More Sports Fans

« On Roger Clemens' Alleged Affair: (May 1, 2008)
On Further Developments In the... » (May 15, 2008)

- Digg
- Facebook
- Stumbleupon
- Twitter
- Reddit
Email
To: From:
Print

The Onion is not intended for readers under 18 years of age.

© Copyright 2009 Onion Inc. All rights reserved.

Meet Other Onion Readers

more personals »