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At the AV Club: Best Music Of The '00s

Fifth Level Of Video Game Reached During Phone Call To Mom

issue 3713 | 04.11.01 | News In Brief

LONGMONT, CO–While speaking on the phone with his mother Monday, Sega Dreamcast enthusiast Jon Grebe, 22, defeated Sarge to reach the fifth level... more»
Bruce Vilanch Sodomized By Homosexual

issue 3713 | 04.11.01 | News In Brief

HOLLYWOOD, CA–In an act "so heinous, it defies the imagination," famed awards-show joke writer and Hollywood Squares regular Bruce Vilanch... more»
Role Of Tree Ineptly Played By Second-Grader

issue 3713 | 04.11.01 | News In Brief

POPLAR BLUFF, MO–Critics savaged Monday's underwhelming stage debut of second-grader Kimberly Bauer, who "fumbled and stumbled her way" through the... more»
Report: Clinton Accepted Rebate While In Office Depot

issue 3713 | 04.11.01 | News In Brief

WASHINGTON, DC–According to a report in Monday's Washington Post, on Jan. 14, Bill Clinton accepted a $60 rebate on an O'Sullivan office... more»
Nation Awaits Word On Today's Slam Dunks

issue 3713 | 04.11.01 | News In Brief

BRISTOL, CT–As of press time, an anxious nation continues to wait for word on today's NBA slam dunks. "The moment we have any information on any... more»
Pillsbury Doughboy Killed By Skittish, Broom-Wielding Housewife

issue 3711 | 03.28.01 | News In Brief

BOWIE, MD–Kenneth Fresh, 34, son of original Pillsbury doughboy Marv "Poppin'" Fresh, was killed Monday when a startled housewife beat him to death... more»
Repressed Molestation Memory Not What It Was Built Up To Be

issue 3711 | 03.28.01 | News In Brief

WEEHAWKEN, NJ–After 22 months of therapy, Kathy Stebbins' long-repressed childhood memory of sexual abuse at the hands of her uncle finally... more»
Giant Blood Clot Dislodges From Your Femoral Artery

issue 3711 | 03.28.01 | News In Brief

CIRCULATORY SYSTEM–According to lower-extremity sources, a blood clot two to three times larger than necessary to cause a heart attack has broken... more»
Man Won't Stop Coming Up With New Sniglets

issue 3711 | 03.28.01 | News In Brief

STOCKTON, CA–Nearly 20 years after the briefly popular lexicographic fad made its debut on HBO's Not Necessarily The News, local resident... more»
Fifth-Grader Writes 'Mrs. Alan Greenspan' All Over Her Notebook

issue 3711 | 03.28.01 | News In Brief

INDEPENDENCE, MO–Brianna Kilgore, 11, a fifth-grader at Westlake Elementary School, was observed scribbling "Mrs. Alan Greenspan" an estimated 200... more»

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At the AV Club: Best Music Of The '00s

News In Brief

Fifth Level Of Video Game Reached During Phone Call To Mom

Bruce Vilanch Sodomized By Homosexual

Role Of Tree Ineptly Played By Second-Grader

Report: Clinton Accepted Rebate While In Office Depot

Nation Awaits Word On Today's Slam Dunks

Pillsbury Doughboy Killed By Skittish, Broom-Wielding Housewife

Repressed Molestation Memory Not What It Was Built Up To Be

Giant Blood Clot Dislodges From Your Femoral Artery

Man Won't Stop Coming Up With New Sniglets

Fifth-Grader Writes 'Mrs. Alan Greenspan' All Over Her Notebook

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At the AV Club: Best Music Of The '00s