Onion News Network

The Onion

It's time to talk about my favorite show. - Oh yours, and about 12 million other people's, Tracy. In case you've been living in a cage, the Onion Broadcast Chanel's breakout reality show hit, "Auto Warriors", Pits two Ford manufacturing plants against one another to find out who can build the most cars in the least amount of time. Now the losing plant gets shut down while workers at the winning plant not only keep their jobs, but their pension, and their health benefits. It's high stakes fun. - It sure is. Now Auto Warriors is airing a special two hour presentation this Thursday night, and we have a sneak preview for you right now. Diller, Michigan plant. Fredricksburg, Indiana plant. Your task today is to build 1, in 24 hours, without electricity. As always, the leader of the losing team will need to choose one department to send to the pink slip circle for downsizing. And now, get back to the factories, and let the sparks fly. Good luck! And joining us here live in the studio this morning, the head of the Diller Factory team, Dennis Hubert, alongside the Vice President of Ford, and the head judge on the show, Daniel Grossman. Thanks guys for being with us this morning. - Thank you for being with us. Thanks for having us. - Now Mr. Grossman, how did you guys at Ford come up with the idea for this fabulous show? Well, we knew we were going to have to close one of the two plants, so we thought, why not let the two factories battle it out, tooth and nail, to see which one really makes the best America's mid-priced sedan. It is quite a show. - I mean, these guys are pulling three, four, five shifts at a time to meet these extreme production quotas, and it's winner takes all. - It's just fabulous watching all those men and women fighting for their livelihoods. I mean, the challenges on the show are pretty wild. - Yeah. Trying to produce more cars than the factory's equipped to handle, working without outdated equipment. - Well, that's all a normal part of working in the plant. Really, the only change is that there's cameras everywhere. So now the bosses make us follow the OSHA rules. Well, let's take a look at another clip from this week's episode. - OK. Gentlemen, you still have 12 hours to complete the challenge. But get ready for another wrench in the works. You both must fire half of your workers and complete the challenge with non-union labor. I'm on the edge of my seat already. - I just love it. Now, you guys gotta tell me. What happens to the people once they're cut from the show? - Oh, like Jose in the first episode. Right. - Remember? Have you talked to hims since he got fired? I just love that little guy. Well yeah, his family lives three houses down. He actually came over and asked to borrow some money. Well OK now, that's all we can say. We don't want to give anything away. If you want to find out about Jose and the medical bills from his mangled hand, you're just going to have to keep watching. - Alright, fair enough. Dennis Hubert, Daniel Grossman, thank you so much for joining us today. Thank you for having us. - Thank you. Coming up after the break we're going to show you how you can avoid injury while glass is shattering all around you. Stay tuned. Still Ahead This Hour... HOW TO GET MORE DONE WHILE YOU SLEEP