via @TheOnion - Autoworkers Compete to Keep Jobs, Livelihoods on New Reality Show
It's time to talk about my favorite show.
- Oh yours, and about
12 million other people's, Tracy.
In case you've been living in a cage,
the Onion Broadcast Chanel's breakout
reality show hit, "Auto Warriors",
Pits two Ford manufacturing
plants against one another
to find out who can build the
most cars in the least amount of time.
Now the losing plant gets shut down
while workers at the winning plant
not only keep their jobs, but their
pension, and their health benefits.
It's high stakes fun.
- It sure is.
Now Auto Warriors is airing a special
two hour presentation this Thursday night,
and we have a sneak preview
for you right now.
Diller, Michigan plant.
Fredricksburg, Indiana plant.
Your task today is to build
1,
in 24 hours,
without electricity.
As always, the leader of the losing team
will need to choose
one department to send to
the pink slip circle for downsizing.
And now, get back
to the factories,
and let the sparks fly.
Good luck!
And joining us here live in the studio
this morning,
the head of the Diller Factory team,
Dennis Hubert,
alongside the Vice President of Ford, and the
head judge on the show, Daniel Grossman.
Thanks guys for being with us this morning.
- Thank you for being with us.
Thanks for having us.
- Now Mr. Grossman, how did you guys at Ford
come up with the idea
for this fabulous show?
Well, we knew we were going to have
to close one of the two plants,
so we thought, why not let the two
factories battle it out, tooth and nail,
to see which one really makes
the best America's mid-priced sedan.
It is quite a show.
- I mean, these guys are pulling
three, four, five shifts at a time
to meet these extreme production quotas,
and it's winner takes all.
- It's just fabulous watching all those
men and women fighting
for their livelihoods.
I mean, the challenges
on the show are pretty wild. - Yeah.
Trying to produce more cars than
the factory's equipped to handle,
working without outdated equipment.
- Well, that's all a normal part
of working in the plant. Really, the only
change is that there's cameras everywhere.
So now the bosses make us
follow the OSHA rules.
Well, let's take a look at another clip
from this week's episode. - OK.
Gentlemen, you still have 12 hours
to complete the challenge.
But get ready for another
wrench in the works.
You both must fire half
of your workers
and complete the challenge
with non-union labor.
I'm on the edge of my seat already.
- I just love it.
Now, you guys gotta tell me.
What happens to the people
once they're cut from the show?
- Oh, like Jose in the first episode.
Right.
- Remember?
Have you talked to hims since
he got fired? I just love that little guy.
Well yeah, his family lives
three houses down.
He actually came over and asked
to borrow some money.
Well OK now, that's all we can say.
We don't want to give anything away.
If you want to find out about Jose
and the medical bills from his mangled hand,
you're just going to have to keep watching.
- Alright, fair enough.
Dennis Hubert, Daniel Grossman,
thank you so much for joining us today.
Thank you for having us.
- Thank you.
Coming up after the break we're going
to show you how you can avoid injury
while glass is shattering
all around you. Stay tuned.
Still Ahead This Hour...
HOW TO GET MORE DONE WHILE YOU SLEEP
Playlists
Label
