Campaign News

• Dems Leave Lieberman Unpunished

  Despite his support of Sen. John McCain's presidential bid, the Democratic Caucus voted to let Sen. Joe Lieberman keep his position chairing the...

  Nov 20, 2008 | American Voices

• International Con Man Barack Obama Leaves U.S. With $85 Million In Campaign Fundraising

  CHICAGO—"If you are reading this," said Obama's farewell note. "Then I have already left your silly country with a woman you have come to know as 'Michelle.'"

  Nov 11, 2008 | News

• Guy You Canvassed With Knows This Great Little Italian Canvassing Place

  PHILADELPHIA—After 18 long months of nonstop canvassing, it would be nice, now that the election is over, to take a break from it all, and your fellow...

  Nov 11, 2008 | News In Brief

• Emanuel Calls For Auto Industry Bailout

  Rahm Emanuel, the chief of staff for the president-elect, is calling for a more rapid response to help the struggling auto industry. What do...

  Nov 11, 2008 | American Voices

• Obama Vows To Wipe Out Llamas

  Nov 11, 2008 | Radio

• Obama Win Causes Obsessive Supporters To Realize How Empty Their Lives Are

  The revelation that Obama's candidacy was the only thing that gave their lives any meaning has caused many supporters to wander aimlessly.

  Nov 05, 2008 | Video

• Nation Finally Shitty Enough To Make Social Progress

  WASHINGTON—President-elect Barack Obama did very well among women and young voters, who were most sensitive to the current climate of everything being fucked.

  Nov 05, 2008 | News

• McCain Gets Hammered At Local VFW

  PHOENIX—After conceding defeat in the 2008 presidential election, former Republican candidate John McCain reportedly got completely hammered...

  Nov 05, 2008 | News In Brief

• Hillary Clinton Resumes Attacking Obama

  NEW YORK—Less than 20 minutes after Barack Obama was elected the 44th president of the United States, New York senator Hillary Clinton...

  Nov 05, 2008 | News In Brief

• Black Man Given Nation's Worst Job

  WASHINGTON—African-American man Barack Obama, 47, was given the least-desirable job in the entire country Tuesday when he was elected...

  Nov 05, 2008 | News In Brief