Mike Huckabee

Mike Huckabee
Mike Huckabee
Signature Issue:
Retrieving the Ark of the Covenant

Stance On Swimming Pig Shows:
Pro

Favorite Swimming Pig:
Ralph

Awards:
Most improved candidate

Biggest Secret:
Gay as a summer hat

Key Issues

  • Health Care
    "I believe that life begins at conception, but doesn't end at birth. It ends on March 27, 2012."
  • Iraq War
    Supports God's decision to tell Bush to invade.
  • Abortion
    Has a folksy little rhyme about the topic which would make it illegal in all 50 states and Puerto Rico.
  • Immigration
    Supports an immigration plan that will allow Jesus back into America.
  • Economy
    "Shucks, to me, the economy is just a bunch of fancy numbers and Washington politics."
  • Climate
    Is unconcerned with climate change since the Rapture is due in 2012.
  • Pakistaniran
    Believes strongly in getting around to learning a bit about foreign affairs.


Jul 05, 2009