Corrections

Homeschooling

Corrections May 29, 2010
The teacher quoted in yesterday's article on homeschooling is named Susan Leventhal, not Sharon Leventhal, as was printed.

Price Of Last Week's Issue

Corrections May 26, 2010
The price of last week's issue of The Onion was mistakenly printed too low. If you purchased that issue, please mail in an additional ...

Onion Chess Column

Corrections May 15, 2010
Last week's Onion Chess column, "Checkmate In 6 Moves," totally missed the black knight on C5, rendering the entire attack a catastrophic blunder.

Moist

Corrections May 11, 2010
After receiving fewer e-mail complaints than usual, it occurred to us that we have failed to incorporate the word "moist" into any of our recent ...

Crossword

Corrections May 1, 2010
Wow, all of you were right. Last week's crossword sure was a big mess. The Onion regrets the error.

Delivery Questions

Corrections Apr 17, 2010
Last Tuesday, The Onion misprinted the number to call for delivery questions. The correct number is 1-800-WHINING.

Marilyn Monroe

Corrections Apr 13, 2010
Yesterday's edition of The Onion contained a minor error. But I ask you, would Marilyn Monroe have shone so brightly without her facial mole?

Teens And Sex

Corrections Mar 31, 2010
The Onion apologizes for last week's "Teens and Sex" column, which erroneously reported that the girl cannot become pregnant if you only stick it ...

Sam's Sports Column

Corrections Mar 20, 2010
Sam McKenna's sports column in last week's issue should have been titled "Grand Sam" instead of "Sam Dunk." The Onion regrets the error.

Financial Reform

Corrections Mar 17, 2010
In yesterday's financial reform article on page 4B, we accidentally used too much ink in the accompanying photo of Rep.

Fire

Corrections Mar 3, 2010
On Tuesday, The Onion reported that no one was injured when fire was set to the I Luv Wigs! store.

Rapist

Corrections Feb 3, 2010
Monday's article on the Fourth Avenue rapist contained a number of hasty presumptions. The assailant could have been wearing any kind of dark shoes ...

Narrative Voice

Corrections Jan 23, 2010
You are outraged by The Onion's recent shift in narrative voice and have sent in many angry letters of complaint.

Internship

Corrections Jan 20, 2010
The information printed last week about The Onion's college internship program contained a number of errors.

Paula

Corrections Jan 10, 2010
In Paula Polite's Wednesday column, she wrote that diners must switch from a salad fork to a shrimp fork if seafood surpasses 20 percent ...

Pipe Bomb

Corrections Jan 9, 2010
The pipe bomb schematic printed in last week's "Crafts" column will explode prematurely, killing anyone attempting to construct it.

Homoerotic

Corrections ISSUE 48•09 Dec 11, 2009
Last week we forgot to include homoerotic undertones in our piece on high school wrestling. The Onion regrets the omission.