SYRACUSE, NY—Days after stepping foot onto the minor league baseball diamond for the first time, recently called up Syracuse Chiefs catcher Kris Watts told ...

CHICAGO—Over the course of the 45-minute victory parade held Friday morning to celebrate the Chicago Blackhawks’ NHL championship, the Stanley Cup sustained nearly a ...

MIAMI—Second-year quarterback Ryan Tannehill expressed his confidence in the Dolphins after minicamp Tuesday, claiming that he believes this team could win almost any number ...

NEW YORK—Praising the 5’11”, 295-pound man’s bulging muscles and massive, ripped physique, the Cleveland Cavaliers announced their selection of bodybuilder Manfred Sampson ...

FRAMINGHAM, MA—Adding yet another wrinkle to the football player and media sensation’s eventful offseason, authorities confirmed today that a former teammate of New ...

OMAHA, NE—Following UCLA’s series-winning sweep of Mississippi State Tuesday night, the College World Series took the opportunity to announce ping.

MIAMI—Calling the seemingly unplanned celebration “quite the party,” city residents were reportedly delighted at the impromptu parade that broke out in downtown Miami on ...

BOSTON—In a thrilling conclusion to the NHL Finals, the Chicago Blackhawks defeated the Boston Bruins in Game 6 of the championship series Monday night ...

EAST LANSING, MI—According to a report published Wednesday by researchers at Michigan State University, staying past the fifth inning of 83 percent of baseball ...

MIAMI—A number of self-proclaimed “big Miami Heat fans” woke up this morning, turned on the local news, and were reportedly thrilled to learn that ...

MIAMI—After winning their second consecutive NBA championship, members of the Miami Heat reportedly spent 10 minutes Thursday laughing in the nation’s stupid fucking ...

KAMPALA, REPUBLIC OF UGANDA—Calling themselves the Miami Heat’s biggest fans and saying that the team embodies everything they love, billionaires Rupert Murdoch and ...

BRISTOL, CT—Expressing confusion and annoyance upon reading the phrase, sources confirmed Wednesday that someone at ESPN thinks it’s okay to call something the ...

MIAMI—As the San Antonio Spurs and the Miami Heat prepare to face off in Tuesday’s Game 6 matchup, a group of NBA experts ...

BOSTON—Several sources confirmed Friday that a man who is paid millions of dollars to play a game was reportedly called gutsy and lauded for ...

DURHAM, NC—A new study published on fan behavior this week revealed that the common practice of waving objects behind the basket to distract free ...

CHARLOTTE, NC—Bobcats owner Michael Jordan announced Wednesday that he has officially hired Patrick Ewing as the team’s assistant coach purely to watch the ...

CINCINNATI—On the same day cornerback Adam “Pacman” Jones pleaded not guilty to assault charges after being accused of striking a woman outside of a ...

FOXBOROUGH, MA—Following news that free agent quarterback Tim Tebow was acquired by the New England Patriots, sources close to the organization told reporters Tuesday ...

NEW YORK—With the Stanley Cup finals quickly approaching, NHL commissioner Gary Bettman told reporters Monday that he’s starting to wonder if he actually ...