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<title>Onion Radio News</title>
<link>http://www.theonion.com/radionews/</link>
<language>en-us</language>
<copyright>2012 The Onion, Inc.</copyright>
<itunes:explicit>Yes</itunes:explicit>
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<item>
<title>Bicycle-Riding Circus Bear Pedals Back To Natural Habitat</title>
<itunes:author>The Onion</itunes:author>
<itunes:summary><![CDATA[]]></itunes:summary>
<itunes:explicit>Yes</itunes:explicit>
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<pubDate>Tue, 15 May 2012 09:30:00 -0400</pubDate>
<guid></guid>
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<item>
<title>Authorities Place Alabama Residents In Foster State</title>
<itunes:author>The Onion</itunes:author>
<itunes:summary><![CDATA[]]></itunes:summary>
<itunes:explicit>Yes</itunes:explicit>
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<pubDate>Mon, 14 May 2012 09:30:00 -0400</pubDate>
<guid></guid>
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<item>
<title>Aviator&#39;s Marriage On Autopilot</title>
<itunes:author>The Onion</itunes:author>
<itunes:summary><![CDATA[]]></itunes:summary>
<itunes:explicit>Yes</itunes:explicit>
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<pubDate>Fri, 11 May 2012 09:30:00 -0400</pubDate>
<guid></guid>
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<item>
<title>Environment-Friendly Hollywood Achieves 91 Percent Recycled Content</title>
<itunes:author>The Onion</itunes:author>
<itunes:summary><![CDATA[]]></itunes:summary>
<itunes:explicit>Yes</itunes:explicit>
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<pubDate>Thu, 10 May 2012 09:30:00 -0400</pubDate>
<guid></guid>
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<item>
<title>Stigmatic Teen Says  His Miracle Is Gross</title>
<itunes:author>The Onion</itunes:author>
<itunes:summary><![CDATA[]]></itunes:summary>
<itunes:explicit>Yes</itunes:explicit>
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<pubDate>Wed, 9 May 2012 09:30:00 -0400</pubDate>
<guid></guid>
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<item>
<title>FDA Approves Napalm Breast Implants</title>
<itunes:author>The Onion</itunes:author>
<itunes:summary><![CDATA[]]></itunes:summary>
<itunes:explicit>Yes</itunes:explicit>
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<pubDate>Tue, 8 May 2012 09:30:00 -0400</pubDate>
<guid></guid>
</item>

<item>
<title>Study: 72 Percent Of All High-Fives Unwarranted</title>
<itunes:author>The Onion</itunes:author>
<itunes:summary><![CDATA[]]></itunes:summary>
<itunes:explicit>Yes</itunes:explicit>
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<pubDate>Mon, 7 May 2012 09:18:00 -0400</pubDate>
<guid></guid>
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<item>
<title>Scientists Discover 6,000-Year-Old Stain</title>
<itunes:author>The Onion</itunes:author>
<itunes:summary><![CDATA[]]></itunes:summary>
<itunes:explicit>Yes</itunes:explicit>
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<pubDate>Fri, 4 May 2012 09:30:00 -0400</pubDate>
<guid></guid>
</item>

<item>
<title>Popular &#39;Dad&#39; Character Will Leave Next Season</title>
<itunes:author>The Onion</itunes:author>
<itunes:summary><![CDATA[]]></itunes:summary>
<itunes:explicit>Yes</itunes:explicit>
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<pubDate>Thu, 3 May 2012 09:30:00 -0400</pubDate>
<guid></guid>
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<item>
<title>Cat General Says War On String May Be Unwinnable</title>
<itunes:author>The Onion</itunes:author>
<itunes:summary><![CDATA[]]></itunes:summary>
<itunes:explicit>Yes</itunes:explicit>
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<pubDate>Wed, 2 May 2012 09:30:00 -0400</pubDate>
<guid></guid>
</item>

<item>
<title>Man Being Dragged By Bus Leaves Hilarious Phone Message</title>
<itunes:author>The Onion</itunes:author>
<itunes:summary><![CDATA[]]></itunes:summary>
<itunes:explicit>Yes</itunes:explicit>
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<pubDate>Tue, 1 May 2012 09:30:00 -0400</pubDate>
<guid></guid>
</item>

<item>
<title>Photographic Evidence Shows Local Mom Used To Be Attractive</title>
<itunes:author>The Onion</itunes:author>
<itunes:summary><![CDATA[]]></itunes:summary>
<itunes:explicit>Yes</itunes:explicit>
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<pubDate>Mon, 30 Apr 2012 12:45:00 -0400</pubDate>
<guid></guid>
</item>

<item>
<title>Mosquito&#39;s Life Cut Short</title>
<itunes:author>The Onion</itunes:author>
<itunes:summary><![CDATA[]]></itunes:summary>
<itunes:explicit>Yes</itunes:explicit>
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<pubDate>Fri, 27 Apr 2012 09:30:00 -0400</pubDate>
<guid></guid>
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<item>
<title>Reverend Blessed With Nine-Inch Penis</title>
<itunes:author>The Onion</itunes:author>
<itunes:summary><![CDATA[]]></itunes:summary>
<itunes:explicit>Yes</itunes:explicit>
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<pubDate>Thu, 26 Apr 2012 09:30:00 -0400</pubDate>
<guid></guid>
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<item>
<title>Cancer Victim Given Second Chance At Death</title>
<itunes:author>The Onion</itunes:author>
<itunes:summary><![CDATA[]]></itunes:summary>
<itunes:explicit>Yes</itunes:explicit>
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<pubDate>Wed, 25 Apr 2012 09:30:00 -0400</pubDate>
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