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Veteran Told What Offends Him

WASHINGTON—In the wake of protests in which some players knelt during the national anthem prior to this week’s NFL games, a U.S. Army veteran has been informed that the acts offended him.

‘Lost Dog’ Poster Really Tooting Dog’s Horn

BROOKLYN, NY—Claiming the flyer could really stand to tone it down a little, sources said a lost dog poster that began appearing in Brooklyn’s Fort Greene neighborhood Tuesday was really tooting the dog’s horn.
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After a series of failed suicide attempts, Maria Trotter, 28, was killed last night in a car accident. The other driver should know not to feel too terrible about the whole thing.

After a series of failed suicide attempts, Maria Trotter, 28, was killed last night in a car accident. The other driver should know not to feel too terrible about the whole thing.

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