adBlockCheck

Entertainment

Stunned Adam Schefter Receives Ominous Tip From Future Self

BRISTOL, CT—Slowly returning to his desk shaken and confused, sources reported Wednesday that ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter was stunned to receive an ominous tip from his future self while walking through one of his office building’s hallways.

Infographic: 20 Years Of Netflix

Netflix was founded as an online DVD rental service in 1997 and has since evolved into a subscription-based streaming platform with its own slate of original programming. The Onion looks back at the most important moments in the company’s 20-year history.

Musical The Kind With Number About Putting On A Show

TALLAHASSEE, FL—Noting the increasingly animated choreography and behavior of the characters on stage, sources at the Tallahassee Community Theatre reported Friday that this is apparently the kind of musical with a big number about putting on a show.

What To Watch For In The New Obi-Wan Kenobi Film

Disney has announced they are in the early stages of developing a stand-alone ‘Star Wars’ film focused on the adventures of Jedi master Obi-Wan Kenobi. Here’s what fans can expect to see in the upcoming release.
End Of Section
  • More News

2010 Oscar Contenders

The Thanksgiving weekend marks the beginning of Hollywood's release of its prestigious films for Oscar consideration. Here are some of the movies that are being positioned to win Academy recognition:

  • Ding-Dong, The Jew Saver—The untold story of how a cancer-riddled, mentally challenged man and his little chocolate lab accidentally saved thousands during World War II.
  • Crash—Anyone dumb enough to have chosen this for Best Picture in 2005 would probably do so again five years later
  • For Colored Girls—Not since The Color Purple has there been a film with more rape, abuse, domestic violence, and large hugging circles while CeCe Winans plays in the background
  • Vendor—A documentary about one man's dream to open a hot-dog cart, and he does it
  • Country Strong—This latest Hulk reboot gets a dramatic, honky-tonk treatment with singer Tim McGraw
  • Big Momma's Houseboat—She has to stay in the middle or the thing rocks too much, but the crooks still don't stand a chance
  • Little Fockers—Robert De Niro finally gets it together in this third installment of the Meet The Parents series, delivering the performance of a lifetime
  • The Movie—Charlie Kaufman's latest project, in which a script is seen being written on a computer screen in real time over the course of 198 hours
  • The Social Network—Dramatization teaches senior Academy members about new technology without them even knowing they're learning

More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close