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MLB Unveils Memorial For Runners Stranded On Base

NEW YORK—Solemnly ringing a bell 30 times for each of the teams that lost potential runs this season, Major League Baseball officials unveiled Tuesday a memorial outside league headquarters to commemorate all of the runners who have ever been stranded on base.

Dale Earnhardt Jr. Submits Paperwork For Gas Reimbursement

LONG POND, PA—Hunching over the steering wheel of his idling No. 88 Chevrolet SS to closely inspect the odometer, NASCAR driver Dale Earnhardt Jr. was reportedly in the process of submitting paperwork Monday to reimburse his gas expenses for the month.

A-Rod Donates $25 Million To Be Displayed In Glass Case In Baseball Hall Of Fame

COOPERSTOWN, NY—Ensuring that a treasured piece of the game’s history will be forever preserved for future generations of fans, representatives of the National Baseball Hall of Fame confirmed Friday that retired third baseman Alex Rodriguez recently donated $25 million of his earnings to be displayed inside a glass case in their museum.
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25 Years Of WrestleMania

To mark the silver anniversary of the greatest show in sports entertainment, we recognize the most spectacular moments from professional wrestling's biggest stage:

1989: The WWF allows Big John Studd to referee a match between Jake Roberts and Andre the Giant despite the fact that Studd doesn't have the proper credentials to officiate

1990: While on top of the second turnbuckle, "Ravishing" Rick Rude removes 45,000 individual layers of tights spray-painted with murals of the wives of every man in the audience

1994: The Canadian-mountie-themed Quebecers enter the ring, wait for five minutes, realize there is no one willing to wrestle them, and walk back the way they came

1996: WWF newcomer "Stone Cold" Steve Austin takes a few minutes to catch his breath and almost throws up after drinking two beers at the same time

1996: The feud between "Rowdy" Roddy Piper and Goldust takes a shocking turn as their match devolves into a blood-drenched no-holds-barred crowd-silencing 40-minute fuck marathon

1998: The Rock becomes a good guy, then goes back to being a bad guy, then back to good guy, then bad guy again, all in the same minute

2003: Rhyno executes the most technically sound arm bar in WrestleMania history

2008: Moments after losing a "Career Threatening" match, Ric Flair marks his last-ever WrestleMania by addressing the crowd with a plaintive 90-minute "Woo"

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