AFC Championship Game (Patriots vs. Ravens)

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Vol 49 Issue 03

Bowling!

Let’s go! Come on, it’ll be fun. Have you ever been to the Lucky Star Lanes? They turn on a bunch of neon lights and play disco music after 9!

Bill Belichick Builds New Tight End From Mutilated Dog Parts

FOXBOROUGH, MA—In a savage and gruesome turn of events, Patriots head coach Bill Belichick reportedly slaughtered a half-dozen dogs adopted from the humane society Friday, sewing together the dismembered body parts to construct a new, horrific tight...

Feces Transplants Help Cure Diarrhea

A new study found that transplanting feces from a healthy person, typically a relative, into the colon of someone suffering diarrhea due to an infection of the Clostridium difficile bacteria proved markedly more effective at curing the ailment than...
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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AFC Championship Game (Patriots vs. Ravens)

The Ravens battle the Patriots in the AFC Championship game, which will be won or lost in the trenches that the Gillette Stadium grounds crew added to the field. Onion Sports looks at what each team must do to win.

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