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Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

NFL Loses Rights To ‘Super Bowl’

NEW YORK—After failing to agree to terms for a new licensing agreement before the February 3 deadline, the NFL lost the rights to the term “Super Bowl” on Friday, sources confirmed.

Keys To The Matchup: Packers vs. Falcons

The NFC Championship Game pits the Atlanta Falcons against the Green Bay Packers for the rare chance to play a meaningful game in Houston. Onion Sports breaks down what each team must do to win.
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America's Most Flawed Sports Facilities

Minute Maid Park: Jesus Christ, a hill in centerfield? With a flagpole in play? What the hell were the Astros thinking?

Qwest Field: The Seahawks organization is unable to explain how, during two years of construction, no one noticed they were building the stadium upside down

Miller Park: Reviews are mixed on the innovative fan-shaped retractable roof, as it allows fans to watch a game in the rain but also crushes everyone in the upper deck to death

Daytona International Speedway: This world-class racing facility has been known to suddenly fill up with tens of thousands of backwards mouth-breathing louts for no discernable reason

Ebbets Field: Is actually a Popeyes Chicken, and not a very clean one, either

Prudential Center: While using dry ice on the rink certainly makes the New Jersey Devils appear more ominous, stopping play to replace the surface every two minutes is a pain in the ass

Coors Field: The beer tap in the center field wall pours the absolute hands-down shittiest beer imaginable

Lambeau Field: There is absolutely nothing whatsoever wrong with Lambeau Field

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Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

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